It has been five months since Owen's passing. I look back on this blog with such complex emotions; Sadness, heartbreak, joy, intense longing, and celebration of all we were able to accomplish together, despite the odds. Our journey was so profoundly beautiful and I struggle regularly with the fact that we had grown comfortably into each other, literally existing as though we were one, and that I am now left feeling as though I am no longer whole. Yes, Owen is "within me." Yes, Owen's spirit lives on everywhere. But the reality is also that I miss his physical body, a presence that grounded me in so many indescribable ways. My loss.
I have learned since October that each person walks the path of loss at their own pace, to their own music and with their own intentions. The path is not linear and the topography is constantly changing. My journey is my own.
And so I continue to walk. To remember. Celebrate. Grieve. Live. And to discover who I am now.
I'm not sure what this post is exactly. The first? The last?
For now, you'll find me pouring so much love and energy surrounding my own loss into Owen's Playground. Come visit us.
Thank you to all of you who walked with us here during Owen's life. We're eternally grateful.
~ S